Saturday, January 10, 2004

I feel terrible.

I'm not sure why I thought it would be a bright idea to go out drinking the night before travelling to Bournemouth, but I did, and now I wish I hadn't. Loser.

It probably has something to do with the fact that it was Lawrence's [my flatmate] birthday yesterday, and I felt obliged to go out with them to celebrate. What started off as a couple of drinks in Wetherspoons, nearly resulted in going with the group to Martha's, and did result in going to Jongleurs, which was fucking expensive. At £4.95 for a double JD and coke, I'm thinking I spent quite a bit. There was the one single JD and coke, but at £2.75, I decided doubles would be better, because they were cheaper, yet still not cheap. And it cost me fucking £5 to get in... bastards...

Anyway... Bournemouth! Train! *scared*

I've never really travelled by train before. But then, I've never really had the opportunity. The only time I did have an opportunity to was when I went to London for the first time. But we went by coach. I did go on the Underground though. It smelt of urine. I hope that the train today doesn't smell of urine. The Underground was bad enough, but at least the journey's were short. I'll be on this train for just other an hour... or these two trains - what the fuck is that all about? I have to change trains!? Is it not difficult enough to buy the ticket and catch one in the first place? I don't know. Never done it. Not difficult. But scary. And a train change is even scary. I'll be fine, I'm sure, but I can't budge the feeling that I'm going to end up in Sweden.

Anyways, I best do the washing up. Pack up my beautiful laptop. And head off.

Ohhhhh, my head....

Thursday, January 08, 2004

I hate essays...

Thursday, January 01, 2004

Russell's New Year Message

Whilst half-watching Buffalo Soldiers, half-moaning about the stupidity of the New Year celebrations [yes, I was one of those losers spending the majority of the New Year on their own. Just without the dogs. Though the family members that I spent the actual midnight part with were just about as interesting to me. As uncaring as that sounds], I decided to do many things.

For a start, I decided that for my New Year to be 'Happy', I would have to live it in a state of blissful ignorance, because, in my opinion, bliss is not obtainable without a certain amount of ignorance. A kind of "always look on the bright side of life" thang. So, starting from today, I shall clear my mind of all those shitbits that cloud my mind, and learn to appreciate the superficialities of life. I can indulge in deeper emotions but only if they ultimately result in a foreseeable feeling of happiness. Of course, the kind of optimism that could be involved in this foresight could lead to disappointment, but then, if that is the case, my resolution was never meant to be, and futile in the first place. If so, I'll know to drop it the following year, and continue merely existing, and trying to keep standing when things do get thrown at me. Whether they be bad eggs or rotten tomatoes. Hmm...

I think it's about time that I started to change my lifestyle in a more physical way as well. It's all very well trying to alter my mentality, but I think something should be done about my physique, etc. That means an increased effort to quell those urges to smoke and drink stupid amounts of alcohol. Well, I think the alcohol drinking might be difficult to stop. It's not alcoholism, its a tendency to drink in the evenings. That's not drug dependency, it's relaxation therapy. I think.

On the side that is slightly less introspective, I bought yet another Missy Elliott album today, which means that I now own 4 of Misdemeanour's LPs. Which is probably the most albums I own by one artist - if that makes sense. I think I've made a commitment. A superficial commitment. Well, I'm getting there.

Oh, the other thing I have to do is get a trophy bride. Not in a male-chauvinist way, in a literal way. I just think it would be funny. I'm only thinking this because my mother has been passing comment all Christmas on how next year there will be an extra guest at our table. I haven't the heart to tell her that I'm probably the least desirable man walking the planet. I've only managed to catch the attention of one, and that was unintentional, and slightly unwanted. Correction: wholly unwanted. So, the probability of success in this field is more or less... well... impossible.